The Soil · About Submission
Women in Submission
Much of what people argue about here does not come from the Quran. So let us go back to the Quran, and read it together.
As for those who lead a righteous life, male or female, while believing, they enter Paradise; without the slightest injustice.
[4:124]People have strong feelings about this subject. Many of those feelings come from things that are not in the Quran at all. Customs. Old habits. Things said so many times that they began to sound like God's words.
So this page does one simple thing. It goes back to what God actually said. Where the Quran is clear, we quote it. Where it says nothing, we say that too, and we do not fill the gap.
If you arrived here upset, from either side, you are welcome. Read slowly. Check every verse for yourself. The search page is there for exactly that.
On This Page
Four parts, and the questions people ask after each one.
Made From One Soul
The Quran tells us that men and women began in the same place. One being. One pair. Everyone after that comes from the two of them.
“O people, observe your Lord; the One who created you from one being, and created from it its mate, then spread from the two many men and women. You shall regard GOD, by whom you swear, and regard the parents. GOD is watching over you.” [4:1]
Look at who God is speaking to. “O people.” All of us. Both men and women come from that one being. The verse does not rank one above the other.
The Same Promise, for Both
Then God does something beautiful. He lists the good qualities of believers, and He names every one of them twice. Once for men. Once for women.
“The submitting men, the submitting women, the believing men, the believing women, the obedient men, the obedient women, the truthful men, the truthful women, the steadfast men, the steadfast women, the reverent men, the reverent women, the charitable men, the charitable women, the fasting men, the fasting women, the chaste men, the chaste women, and the men who commemorate GOD frequently, and the commemorating women; GOD has prepared for them forgiveness and a great recompense.” [33:35]
Ten qualities. Each one said twice. And at the end, one reward for all of them together.
In another verse, God says it in plain words: “I never fail to reward any worker among you for any work you do, be you male or female—you are equal to one another.” [3:195] You are equal to one another. Those are God's words.
And when God tells us how He ranks people, He gives only one measure: “The best among you in the sight of GOD is the most righteous.” [49:13] The measure is righteousness. It is open to every man and every woman.
Who Was Blamed in the Garden
Many of us grew up with a story where the woman ate first and led the man into sin. The Quran tells the story differently.
In the Quran, the devil whispers to both of them. Both are fooled: “He thus duped them with lies.” [7:22] And both turn back to God together, with the same words: “Our Lord, we have wronged our souls, and unless You forgive us and have mercy on us, we will be losers.” [7:23]
When the story is told again in another sura, both eat from the tree, and it is Adam whom God names: “Adam thus disobeyed his Lord, and fell.” [20:121] Then God chose him, redeemed him, and guided him [20:122].
Nowhere does the Quran blame the woman on her own. So the idea that women brought sin into the world did not come from the Quran.
Her Voice Is Heard
The Quran also shows women speaking about faith, and being heard.
God describes believing men and women calling people to good, side by side: “The believing men and women are allies of one another. They advocate righteousness and forbid evil, they observe the Contact Prayers (Salat) and give the obligatory charity (Zakat), and they obey GOD and His messenger.” [9:71]
One sura even opens with a woman who argued with the Prophet about her husband, and took her complaint to God. God said: “GOD has heard the woman who debated with you about her husband, and complained to GOD.” [58:1]
In the very next verse, God condemns an old custom some husbands used against their wives, and calls it “a blasphemy and a falsehood” [58:2]. God heard her. And He put it in the Quran, for all of us to read.
Questions About Men, Women and God
Does the Quran treat men and women as spiritually equal?
Yes. And God says so in plain words. He tells us: “I never fail to reward any worker among you for any work you do, be you male or female—you are equal to one another.” [3:195] It is hard to say it more clearly than that. God also lists ten good qualities of believers, and names each one twice, once for men and once for women. Then He gives them all one reward: “forgiveness and a great recompense” [33:35]. And when He tells us how He ranks people, He gives only one measure: “The best among you in the sight of GOD is the most righteous.” [49:13] So being a man or a woman does not decide our standing with God. How we live decides it. Anyone who leads a righteous life, “male or female, while believing”, enters Paradise “without the slightest injustice” [4:124].
Does the Quran blame women for the first sin?
No. In the Quran, the man and the woman are fooled together, and they repent together. The devil whispers to both of them. God says: “He thus duped them with lies.” [7:22] Then both of them turn to God with the same words: “Our Lord, we have wronged our souls, and unless You forgive us and have mercy on us, we will be losers.” [7:23] When the story is told again, both eat from the tree, and it is Adam whom God names: “Adam thus disobeyed his Lord, and fell.” [20:121] And in the next verse, God chooses him, redeems him and guides him [20:122]. The story many of us grew up with, where the woman leads the man into sin, is not the Quran's story. Nowhere does the Quran blame the woman on her own. So we do not need to carry that idea, and no woman should be made to carry it either.
Can a woman teach and speak about religion?
Yes. The Quran gives this work to believing women and men together. God says: “The believing men and women are allies of one another. They advocate righteousness and forbid evil” [9:71]. Calling people to what is right, and warning them away from what is wrong, is religious work. God describes both doing it, and adds no special condition for women. The Quran also records a woman who argued with the Prophet about her marriage and took her complaint to God. God did not tell her to be quiet. He said: “GOD has heard the woman who debated with you about her husband, and complained to GOD.” [58:1] We have not found a verse that tells women to stay silent about faith. If someone says there is one, the kind and simple thing to do is to ask them for the verse.
What Belongs to Her
In many times and places, a woman had very little that was truly her own. The Quran gave her a share, by name, in God's own law.
Her inheritance is hers: “The men get a share of what the parents and the relatives leave behind. The women too shall get a share of what the parents and relatives leave behind. Whether it is a small or a large inheritance, (the women must get) a definite share.” [4:7] Small or large, God says the women must get a definite share.
Her dowry is hers: “You shall give the women their due dowries, equitably. If they willingly forfeit anything, then you may accept it; it is rightfully yours.” [4:4] Only she can choose to give any of it back.
And what she was given stays hers. Even if a husband wants to marry another wife in her place, he cannot take back what he gave her. God asks: “Would you take it fraudulently, maliciously, and sinfully?” [4:20]
God also tells men and women not to envy each other: “the men enjoy certain qualities, and the women enjoy certain qualities.” [4:32] Each has been given something by God, and neither should covet the other's.
Her Word as a Witness
Another verse is often used to say that a woman's word is worth half a man's. Let us read what it really says.
It is a verse about writing down a loan. It is long and careful, and in the middle it says: “Two men shall serve as witnesses; if not two men, then a man and two women whose testimony is acceptable to all. Thus, if one woman becomes biased, the other will remind her.” [2:282] The reason is given right there in the verse.
The footnote in this translation says that money dealings are the only situations where two women may take the place of one man as a witness. It is a rule for money dealings. It is not a rule for every kind of testimony.
And in a far more serious matter, a wife's own oaths clear her. If her husband accuses her of adultery and has no other witnesses, God says: “She shall be considered innocent if she swears by GOD four times that he is a liar.” [24:8] She swears the same number of oaths as he does [24:6-9], and her oaths are enough to clear her.
Questions About What Is Hers
What rights does the Quran give a woman over her own property?
Real rights, written as God's law. Her inheritance is hers. God says: “The women too shall get a share of what the parents and relatives leave behind.” And whatever the size, “(the women must get) a definite share” [4:7]. Her dowry is hers. God commands: “You shall give the women their due dowries, equitably.” Only if she chooses to give some of it back may it be accepted [4:4]. What she was given stays hers. Even if a husband wants to marry another wife in her place, he may not take back what he gave her. God asks: “Would you take it fraudulently, maliciously, and sinfully?” [4:20] And God forbids taking what women leave behind against their will, and forcing them to give up what they were given, except in a case of proven adultery [4:19]. So if someone controls a woman's money and says it is God's will, we can gently ask where God said it. We have not found it in the Quran.
Why does a son inherit twice as much as a daughter?
Because of who usually provides for a family. And even then, a will can change the shares. The verse says: “GOD decrees a will for the benefit of your children; the male gets twice the share of the female.” [4:11] The footnote explains that, generally, the son is responsible for a family, while the daughter is taken care of by a husband. In the same sura, God makes men “the bread earners” [4:34]. But these shares are what happens when no will is left. The verse itself says they come “after fulfilling any will the deceased has left, and after paying off all debts” [4:11]. And God commands every believer to write a will “for the benefit of the parents and relatives, equitably” [2:180]. The footnote gives a clear example. If the son is rich and the daughter is poor, a parent may leave a will giving the daughter everything, or twice as much as the son. So this rule does not say a daughter is worth less. It is what happens when no will is left, and God gives us the will so we can be fair.
Is a woman's testimony worth half of a man's?
No. That idea comes from one verse about one kind of business, stretched far beyond what it says. The verse is about writing down a loan. It says: “Two men shall serve as witnesses; if not two men, then a man and two women whose testimony is acceptable to all. Thus, if one woman becomes biased, the other will remind her.” [2:282] The reason is given right there. The footnote in this translation says that money dealings are the only situations where two women may take the place of one man as a witness. It is a rule for money dealings. It is not a rule for every kind of testimony. And in a far more serious case, a wife's own oaths clear her. If her husband accuses her of adultery with no other witnesses, God says: “She shall be considered innocent if she swears by GOD four times that he is a liar.” [24:8] She swears just as many oaths as he does, and her word clears her.
Marriage, as God Describes It
Before any rules, the Quran tells us what a marriage is meant to be.
“Among His proofs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves, in order to have tranquility and contentment with each other, and He placed in your hearts love and care towards your spouses. In this, there are sufficient proofs for people who think.” [30:21]
Tranquility. Contentment. Love and care. God says He placed that love in our hearts Himself, and He calls it one of His proofs.
God also describes husband and wife as keeping each other's secrets: “They are the keepers of your secrets, and you are the keepers of their secrets.” [2:187] The same words, both ways.
And He gives husbands a plain command: “You shall treat them nicely. If you dislike them, you may dislike something wherein GOD has placed a lot of good.” [4:19]
Verse 4:34, Read With Care
This is the verse people ask about most. So let us read the whole of it, slowly, and not hide any part of it.
“The men are made responsible for the women, and GOD has endowed them with certain qualities, and made them the bread earners. The righteous women will cheerfully accept this arrangement, since it is GOD's commandment, and honor their husbands during their absence. If you experience rebellion from the women, you shall first talk to them, then (you may use negative incentives like) deserting them in bed, then you may (as a last alternative) beat them. If they obey you, you are not permitted to transgress against them. GOD is Most High, Supreme.” [4:34]
The verse starts with roles. God makes men responsible for the women, and makes them “the bread earners”. The righteous women accept this arrangement, because it is God's commandment, and they honor their husbands while they are away.
The footnote in this translation explains this with a picture. Marriage is like a ship, and the husband is the ‘captain of the ship’. The captain runs the ship after talking things through with his officers. He does not run it alone.
Then the verse speaks about a harder time: when a wife rebels, and the marriage is in serious trouble. The translation puts a heading over this verse: ‘Do Not Beat Your Wife’. And its footnote explains why.
The footnote says that God prohibits wife-beating here by using the best psychological approach. It gives an example. If I do not want you to shop at Market X, I ask you to shop at Market Y first. Then at Market Z. Only as a last resort, at Market X. That keeps you away from Market X, without insulting you. In the same way, God gives other steps first, so that the last one is never reached.
The footnote also reminds us of something important. The theme of this whole sura is protecting women. So any reading of its verses must be in favor of the women.
The Steps, and How Each One Protects Her
The verse gives these steps in order, and each one gives the marriage another chance. The next verse adds one more way to help.
First: talk
The steps begin with words: “you shall first talk to them”. Before anything else, the husband must sit down and talk. Talking always comes first.
[4:34]
Second: step back
If talking does not help, he may leave the bed for a time. The verse calls this one of the “negative incentives”. There is still time to make peace.
[4:34]
Last, and meant never to be reached
The verse allows the last step only “as a last alternative”. The footnote in this translation reads the whole order as God's way of keeping a husband from ever getting there. And the verse sets a limit straight after: “If they obey you, you are not permitted to transgress against them.”
[4:34]
Also: bring in both families
The next verse gives another way to help: “If a couple fears separation, you shall appoint an arbitrator from his family and an arbitrator from her family; if they decide to reconcile, GOD will help them get together.” Her side of the family has a place at the table too.
[4:35]
What the Verse Does Not Allow
Read with the rest of the Quran, this verse cannot be used to frighten a wife. God commands husbands: “You shall treat them nicely.” [4:19]
Even when a marriage is ending, God forbids keeping a woman in it to hurt her: “Do not force them to stay against their will, as a revenge.” [2:231] And He forbids making her life so hard that she leaves: “do not make life so miserable for them that they leave on their own.” [65:6]
A man who uses this verse to scare his wife has read one line and missed the sura around it. The footnote in this translation calls that sura's theme ‘protection of women’.
More Than One Wife
The Quran allows a man to marry more than one wife, but in one setting, and with strong limits. The translation gives the verse the heading ‘Grounds For Polygamy’.
“If you deem it best for the orphans, you may marry their mothers—you may marry two, three, or four. If you fear lest you become unfair, then you shall be content with only one, or with what you already have. Additionally, you are thus more likely to avoid financial hardship.” [4:3]
The reason given is the orphans. Then the verse turns back to one wife. Later in the same sura, God says: “You can never be equitable in dealing with more than one wife, no matter how hard you try.” [4:129] The translation's heading over that verse is ‘Polygamy Discouraged’.
An appendix in this translation explains more. It notes that the Prophet Muhammad was married to one wife, Khadijah, for twenty-five years, until she died. And it gives simple tests. Polygamy must ease pain and suffering, not cause it. With a young family, it is almost certainly an abuse. And marrying a younger wife to replace the first is an abuse of God's law.
So the door is open only in a narrow place. And God Himself says that a man can never be fair between wives, no matter how hard he tries.
When a Marriage Ends
Sometimes, even after every step, a marriage ends. God does not leave the woman without protection then either.
The translation gives one verse the heading ‘Divorce Discouraged’, and the verse begins with her: “If a woman senses oppression or desertion from her husband, the couple shall try to reconcile their differences, for conciliation is best for them.” [4:128]
If they still part, God sets rules to keep her safe. During the waiting time, she may stay in the home: “You shall allow them to live in the same home in which they lived with you, and do not make life so miserable for them that they leave on their own.” [65:6] What he gave her stays hers: “It is not lawful for the husband to take back anything he had given her.” [2:229] If the marriage truly cannot go on, she may choose to give some of it back. No one may make her. She is to be provided for: “The divorcees also shall be provided for, equitably.” [2:241]
Two witnesses must be present at the divorce [65:2]. And if the two later make peace, no one may stop her from going back to her husband [2:232].
And if they must part, God makes a promise to both of them: “If the couple must decide to part, GOD will provide for each of them from His bounties.” [4:130]
Questions About Marriage
What about 4:34, the verse people quote about beating wives?
This verse needs a careful answer, and the translation we use gives one. It puts a heading over the verse: ‘Do Not Beat Your Wife’. The verse speaks about a harder time, when a wife rebels and the marriage is in serious trouble, and it sets out steps in order. First, talk. Then, leave the bed for a while. Only after that comes the last step, “as a last alternative”. The footnote in this translation says that God is using the best psychological approach here to stop wife-beating. If someone wants to keep us away from Market X, they send us to Market Y first, then Market Z, and only last to Market X. The earlier steps are there so that the last one is never reached. The verse also sets its own limit: “If they obey you, you are not permitted to transgress against them.” [4:34] And the next verse brings in help from both families: “you shall appoint an arbitrator from his family and an arbitrator from her family” [4:35]. The footnote reminds us that the theme of this whole sura is protecting women, so any reading of it must be in their favor. God commands husbands: “You shall treat them nicely.” [4:19] A man who uses this verse to frighten his wife has taken one line out of a sura whose theme is the protection of women.
Does the Quran allow a man to have more than one wife?
Yes, but only in a narrow case, and with strong warnings around it. The permission is tied to orphans: “If you deem it best for the orphans, you may marry their mothers—you may marry two, three, or four.” [4:3] The same verse turns straight back: “If you fear lest you become unfair, then you shall be content with only one, or with what you already have.” Later in the same sura, God says: “You can never be equitable in dealing with more than one wife, no matter how hard you try.” [4:129] The translation puts the heading ‘Polygamy Discouraged’ over that verse. An appendix in this translation adds simple tests. Polygamy must ease pain and suffering, not cause it. With a young family, it is almost certainly an abuse. And taking a younger wife to replace the first is an abuse of God's law. It also reminds us that the Prophet Muhammad was married to Khadijah alone for twenty-five years. So the door exists, but it is narrow. And God says plainly that a man can never be fair between wives, no matter how hard he tries.
What protections does the Quran give a woman when a marriage ends?
Many, and they are written as commands. During the waiting time after a divorce, she may stay in the home she lived in, and her husband must not make life so hard that she leaves: “You shall allow them to live in the same home in which they lived with you, and do not make life so miserable for them that they leave on their own.” [65:6] What he gave her stays hers: “It is not lawful for the husband to take back anything he had given her.” [2:229] If the marriage truly cannot go on, she may choose to give some of it back. No one may make her. And she must be provided for: “The divorcees also shall be provided for, equitably.” [2:241] God also forbids keeping a woman in a marriage just to hurt her, and He tells couples to try to make peace first. But if they must part, He makes them both a promise: “If the couple must decide to part, GOD will provide for each of them from His bounties.” [4:130]
Custom or Quran?
Much of what is said about women in the name of religion does not come from the Quran. It is custom. It is habit. It is what people found their parents doing.
The Quran describes this very thing. People say: “We found our parents carrying on certain practices, and we are following in their footsteps.” [43:22] This is not only about people long ago. Any of us can do it.
The table below lists ten things people often say about women. For each one, it shows where the idea really comes from, and what the Quran says. In almost every row, the idea did not come from the Quran.
What People Say, and What the Quran Says
Left: what you may have heard. Middle: where it really comes from. Right: what the Quran says, with the verse so you can check it yourself.
| What people say | Where it really comes from | What the Quran says |
|---|---|---|
| Women are lesser than men before God | Not from the Quran. It comes from older customs, and from later reports and commentary that read it into verses that do not say it. | God names ten good qualities twice, once for men and once for women, and gives them one reward [33:35]. He says “be you male or female—you are equal to one another” [3:195]. The only measure is righteousness [49:13]. |
| A woman's word as a witness is always worth half | One verse about writing down a loan, stretched to cover every kind of testimony. | The verse is about recording a debt, and gives its own reason: “if one woman becomes biased, the other will remind her” [2:282]. The footnote in this translation says money dealings are the only case. And when a husband accuses his wife, her own oaths clear her [24:8]. |
| Women should not teach or speak about religion | Later reports and local custom. We have not found a verse that says it. | Believing men and women together “advocate righteousness and forbid evil” [9:71]. A woman argued with the Prophet about her marriage, and God said He heard her [58:1]. |
| Women must cover their faces | Old regional custom. The footnote in this translation says tyrannical Arab traditions gave the false idea that a woman must be covered from head to toe. | Women are told not to reveal their bodies except what is necessary, and to “cover their chests” [24:31]. Another verse tells them to “lengthen their garments” [33:59]. The footnote in this translation calls covering the chest and lengthening the garment the minimum. The face is not mentioned. And God gives men the modesty command first [24:30]. |
| A woman may not work or go out without a man's permission | Household custom and later reports. We have not found a verse that says it. | Two women in Midyan came out to water their animals, because their father was an old man [28:23]. Believing women came to the Prophet to give their own pledge [60:12]. The verse that says “settle down in your homes” belongs to a passage that begins “O wives of the prophet, you are not the same as any other women” [33:32-33]. It says nothing about asking permission. |
| A woman cannot own her own wealth | Old customs from places where women owned little. The Quran says the opposite. | Her inheritance: “(the women must get) a definite share” [4:7]. Her dowry is hers [4:4]. A husband who replaces her with another wife may not take back what he gave her [4:20]. |
| A divorced woman can be sent away with nothing | Custom. The Quran sets out her rights in detail. | During the waiting time, she may stay in the home [65:6]. He may not take back what he gave her [2:229]. “The divorcees also shall be provided for, equitably.” [2:241] |
| Paradise is promised mainly to men | Not from the Quran. | “whoever works righteousness—male or female—while believing, these will enter Paradise” [40:40]. The same promise is in [4:124]. And [16:97] promises both a happy life in this world and a full reward, “male or female”. |
| Women brought sin into the world | An older story carried into the religion. The Quran tells it differently. | Both were fooled: “He thus duped them with lies.” [7:22] Both repented [7:23]. And “Adam thus disobeyed his Lord, and fell.” [20:121] |
| A daughter is a lesser blessing than a son | An old custom that the Quran condemns. | God describes the man who is ashamed at the birth of a girl, and says: “Miserable indeed is their judgment.” [16:59] On the Day of Judgment, the girl who was buried alive will be asked for what crime she was killed [81:8-9]. |
Ask for the Verse
Here is a simple habit that helps. When someone tells you something about women and God, ask one gentle question: which verse is that?
Ask kindly. Then wait. A claim that comes from God will have a verse. If the answer is a story, a famous name, or ‘everyone knows’, then you have learned where it came from.
God commands all of us: “You shall not accept any information, unless you verify it for yourself.” [17:36] That command is for men and women alike. Nothing in the Quran makes checking a man's job. Anyone may read, and anyone may ask.
Questions About Custom
What does the Quran actually require in terms of dress?
Modesty, for men and women both. And less detail than many of us were told. God speaks to men first: “Tell the believing men that they shall subdue their eyes (and not stare at the women), and to maintain their chastity.” [24:30] Then He gives women the same two commands, and more: not to reveal their bodies except what is necessary, and “They shall cover their chests” [24:31]. Another verse adds that women “shall lengthen their garments”, so that they are recognized and not insulted [33:59]. The footnote in this translation calls covering the chest and lengthening the garment the minimum. The face is not mentioned. The same footnote says that tyrannical Arab traditions gave the false idea that a woman must be covered from head to toe, and that this is not a Quranic dress. The question of the hair has its own answer on Lawful and Unlawful. And God reminds all of us what matters most: “the best garment is the garment of righteousness” [7:26].
Why do so many Muslim-majority cultures treat women in ways the Quran does not describe?
Because customs are old, and they are strong. When people receive God's message, they often keep their old ways and give them religious names. The Quran describes this plainly. People say: “We found our parents carrying on certain practices, and we are following in their footsteps.” [43:22] That can be true of any of us. Many of us came to our beliefs this way. Over time, customs were given the support of stories, then of famous names, until they looked as if they came from God. The Quran warns about this: “They follow idols who decree for them religious laws never authorized by GOD.” [42:21] So we do not need to blame anyone. We can go back, together, to what God actually said, and let His words decide.
I am a woman who has been hurt by people speaking in God's name. Where do I start?
We start by keeping God and those people apart. What they said and what God said are not the same thing. If we were told that God thinks less of us, we were told something the Quran does not say. God's own words are there for us to read: “be you male or female—you are equal to one another” [3:195]. We can go to God directly. No one has to stand in between, and no one's permission is needed. God says: “When My servants ask you about Me, I am always near. I answer their prayers when they pray to Me.” [2:186] There is no rush. We can read for ourselves, a little at a time, and let God's words speak for themselves. Healing can take its own time, and God is near all the way.
Can women drive, work, and go out on their own?
Yes. Nothing in the Quran limits where a woman may go, or what work she may do. One passage is always quoted against this, so let us take it first. God tells the Prophet's wives: “You shall settle down in your homes, and do not mingle with the people excessively, like you used to do in the old days of ignorance.” [33:33] The line just before it says who is being addressed: “O wives of the prophet, you are not the same as any other women” [33:32]. God says there, in His own words, that they are not the general case. Their household carried a new revelation, and He gave them a heavier duty because of it. Everywhere else the Quran shows women out in the world and never objects. It even shows one ruling a nation. Solomon is brought news of a distant kingdom: “I found a woman ruling them, who is blessed with everything, and possesses a tremendous palace.” [27:23] She takes counsel, decides, and is never once criticised for holding the office. God gives the same public religious work to both: “The believing men and women are allies of one another. They advocate righteousness and forbid evil” [9:71]. Driving, travel and employment are never addressed. A rule God did not give is a rule nobody may give in His name.
Voices of Submission
God's word first. Below are three women from the Quran, written from the verses.
A woman named in the Quran
Mary. She is the only woman the Quran names by her own name, and a whole sura carries it. The angels said to her: “O Mary, GOD has chosen you and purified you. He has chosen you from all the women.” [3:42] She was alone when God's messenger came to her, and she asked him a direct question: “How can I have a son, when no man has touched me; I have never been unchaste” [19:20]. She was answered, not scolded. God sums her up: “She believed in the words of her Lord and His scriptures; she was obedient.” [66:12] What God holds up in her is faith, chastity and obedience.
A woman whose faith is held up as an example
The wife of Pharaoh. God cites her as an example of those who believed: “And GOD cites as an example of those who believed the wife of Pharaoh. She said, ‘My Lord, build a home for me at You in Paradise, and save me from Pharaoh and his works; save me from the transgressing people.’” [66:11] She was married to Pharaoh, the tyrant, and her faith was her own. Read the verse before it, where the wives of Noah and Lot are examples of disbelief, even though their husbands were righteous [66:10]. Nobody's standing with God comes from a husband.
A woman who ruled, and chose God
The Queen of Sheba. She ruled her people: “I found a woman ruling them, who is blessed with everything, and possesses a tremendous palace” [27:23]. She and her people bowed to the sun instead of God [27:24]. She did not rush. She asked her advisers first: “I am not deciding anything until you advise me.” [27:32] And when she saw the truth, she said it in her own words: “My Lord, I have wronged my soul. I now submit with Solomon to GOD, Lord of the universe.” [27:44] She thought carefully, and she changed.
What the Quran Says About Women and Men
Nine passages that hold this whole page together.
O people, observe your Lord; the One who created you from one being, and created from it its mate, then spread from the two many men and women. You shall regard GOD, by whom you swear, and regard the parents. GOD is watching over you.[4:1]
One beginning for everyone
The submitting men, the submitting women, the believing men, the believing women, the obedient men, the obedient women, the truthful men, the truthful women, the steadfast men, the steadfast women, the reverent men, the reverent women, the charitable men, the charitable women, the fasting men, the fasting women, the chaste men, the chaste women, and the men who commemorate GOD frequently, and the commemorating women; GOD has prepared for them forgiveness and a great recompense.[33:35]
Ten qualities, each named for men and for women, and one reward
Their Lord responded to them: "I never fail to reward any worker among you for any work you do, be you male or female—you are equal to one another. Thus, those who immigrate, and get evicted from their homes, and are persecuted because of Me, and fight and get killed, I will surely remit their sins and admit them into gardens with flowing streams." Such is the reward from GOD. GOD possesses the ultimate reward.[3:195]
“you are equal to one another”
O people, we created you from the same male and female, and rendered you distinct peoples and tribes, that you may recognize one another. The best among you in the sight of GOD is the most righteous. GOD is Omniscient, Cognizant.[49:13]
The one measure God uses
The men get a share of what the parents and the relatives leave behind. The women too shall get a share of what the parents and relatives leave behind. Whether it is a small or a large inheritance, (the women must get) a definite share.[4:7]
Her inheritance, a definite share
Among His proofs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves, in order to have tranquility and contentment with each other, and He placed in your hearts love and care towards your spouses. In this, there are sufficient proofs for people who think.[30:21]
What a marriage is meant to be
The men are made responsible for the women, and GOD has endowed them with certain qualities, and made them the bread earners. The righteous women will cheerfully accept this arrangement, since it is GOD's commandment, and honor their husbands during their absence. If you experience rebellion from the women, you shall first talk to them, then (you may use negative incentives like) deserting them in bed, then you may (as a last alternative) beat them. If they obey you, you are not permitted to transgress against them. GOD is Most High, Supreme.[4:34]
The translation's heading over this verse: ‘Do Not Beat Your Wife’
If a couple fears separation, you shall appoint an arbitrator from his family and an arbitrator from her family; if they decide to reconcile, GOD will help them get together. GOD is Omniscient, Cognizant.[4:35]
Both families brought in to help
As for those who lead a righteous life, male or female, while believing, they enter Paradise; without the slightest injustice.[4:124]
Paradise, on the same terms for both
Growth Prompt
Pick one thing about women and faith that you grew up hearing. Look for it in the Quran yourself, using the search page. Write down what you found, even if you found nothing.
Which belief about women and God did I inherit without ever checking? And what happened when I looked for the verse?
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